If you are experiencing any of the following, then you are being subjected to emotional abuse
- Are they constantly checking up on you by wanting to know what you are doing and where you are?
- Are they continually pointing out your faults, mistakes, and weaknesses?
- Are they lacking compassion or empathy for you and others?
- Are they at times emotionally distant and you find yourself asking if something is wrong and are they OK?
- Are they extremely jealous and possessive?
- Are they demanding to the point of expecting you to act like a servant in your own home?
- Are you accused of being too sensitive so that they can deflect their abusive comments?
- Are you afraid to say or do anything to upset your partner in case they become angry?
- Are you pressured into having sex when you don’t want to?
- Are you stopped from going where you want to?
- Are you told what to think?
- Do they accuse you of having anger issues and make themselves out to be the victim?
- Do they blame you for any problems they are having, at work, with their family, with their life in general?
- Do they constantly cross your boundaries and ignore you when you request anything of them?
- Do they guilt trip into getting their own way?
- Do they have control of the finances including your money? This is also financial abuse.
- Do they have a derogatory pet name that is cloaked as an endearment?
- Do they ignore your suggestions and views? Do they consider them stupid?
- Do they make decisions without consulting you that affect both of you and or your family?
- Do they make grand gestures if they believe they are in the wrong or want to impress someone?
- Do they prevent you from seeing your family and friends?
- Do they show you complete contempt and consider you worthless?
- Do they tell you that you can’t cope without them, that you are useless and will be nothing without them?
- Do they tell you what clothes to buy and what to wear?
- Do they say things that frighten, intimidate and upset you to the point you feel threatened?
- Do they use your past against you and even weaponise it?
- Do they see you as an extension of themselves as opposed to seeing you as a person in your own right?
- Do they show a “Jekyll and Hyde temperament, one moment having fun, the next moment shouting at you for no reason?
- Do they make jokes at your expense?
- Do they monitor you internet usage including what websites you are looking at?
- Do they want access to your email and mobile and check to see who you are in contact with?
- Do they prevent you from seeing your friends, or making new friends?
- Do they threaten to leave you and take your children?
- Do they threaten your pets?
- Do they walk out if they are not getting their way in a discussion or argument and make you believe they are not coming back?
- Do they threaten to commit suicide if you leave them?
- Do they have friends of the opposite sex, but don’t like it if you do?
- Do they gaslight you? That is they deny something you know is true and you end up questioning your own memory and sanity.
- Do you believe it is your responsibility to keep them happy otherwise they will harm you?
- Do you take the blame for things that you haven’t done before they blame you?
- Have they isolated you?
- Have they forced you into doing something that makes you uncomfortable or is illegal?
- Have they turned others against you?
- Have they shared personal information about you with others?
- Have they made you feel sorry for them by telling you stories of their past relationships or how they have been treated by their parents?
- If you are unwell whether physically or mentally do they expect you to carry on as normal?
- No matter what you do are you always in the wrong?
- When out in public do they deliberately embarrass you?
- When they apologise does it sound more like a non-apology?
- When you are on your own do feel happier than when they are there?
Nobody should be subjected to any of the above. It is you who are in control of the decisions you make.